Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Best. Pesach Game. Ever.

So Pesach is fun. It is one of my favorite holidays. But…it gets tedious…it gets a little matzahtastic. Thankfully the unborn child is happy as it seems to be using the matzah cement in my tummy to build a pool. Happy happy joy joy. But overall I have to say a fun but long holiday. So in my unending cleverness I have devised a game to make time move a little faster, and perhaps give my colon something to aspire to. It really is a brilliant invention when you think about how much entertaining has to be done on this holiday. How much showmanship there is at the seders. How much time and energy is put in the kitchen. And how much effort goes in to making everything (including your matzah bloated tushie) look good.


Ladies and Gentleman, this is Passover Idol.


It has been a tight race here at Mahotma Arena. We are 3 days and 2 seders into the competition and there is no way to call a winner just yet. An unfortunate but early loss in the competition was Chametz. Apparently he broke some of the Passover Idol guidelines as his leavened goodness was just too much for this competition to bear. His presence will be missed for the remainder of the competition.


The first seder was a toughy. There was an amazing show put on in the kitchen by Mahotma Mama, Mahotma Auntie and Mahotma Baubie. Mahotma Zaide won huge points at the end of the evening with his version of Hallel on Speed and helping finish the show on time. But unfortunately first seder was when we had to say goodbye to Mahotma Uncle as Mahotma Cutest Princess Genius Daughter took over as the Mah Nishta Nah champion in the family with her crystal clear version of the 4 Questions in Falsetto. Well done.


Second seder was also a tight race, beautiful singing and food for all. However Mahotma Zaide won the fewest votes and was eliminated. This former crowd favorite lost support when he openly admitted he chose to not purchase the “Let My People Go” toilet seat cover. Tough break Mahotma Zaide.


In the moed portion of Idol things heated up as Mahotma Baubie blew the rest of the competitors out of the water as she showed us all how to spend the day power shopping for the impossible to find toddler Mary Jane crocs (in purple). Mahotma Daddy and Mahotma Auntie were in the bottom 2 last night as they both had to return to their “real” jobs and clearly could not give the competition their full attention. However, thanks to Mahotma Auntie’s miraculous ability to prepare for her major field exam while making it back in time to join her niece for dinner, it was Mahotma Daddy who is no longer in the running for Passover Idol. We shall miss you Mahotma Daddy.


So who will be eliminated this evening? Will Mahotma Cutest Princess Genius Daughter’s inability to sleep past 7am cause her to lose some of her many supporters? Will Mahotma Unborn Child be able to pull out a silent victory? Will Mahotma Auntie be able to make it in time for dinner? The answers to these questions and more will be answered tonight as we get one step closer to crowning this year’s Passover Idol.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Another contender: the Idolatrous Chad Gad'Ya Seder Plate! Mahotma Baubie and Zaide picked it up in Israel. It's a conga line of figurines depicting the characters from the famous Seder closing number. Given that a guest did once call it "Avodah Zarah," it might just sneak in for the win...

Anonymous said...

Sympathy votes for me, from those who also must work for food:
1(8XX)DAD-CASH

Anonymous said...

If it wasn't for Simon Cowitz, I would still be in the game. For the sake of devoted dads everywhere call in to vote me back in!

Phyllis Sommer said...

LOL i can't wait for the results...