Wednesday, August 22, 2007

tshuvah thoughts

I have been thinking lately about how to help my almost 3-year old maximize his chances for doing tshuvah. The other day, we were on the metro and it was time to get off. We were on our way to meet a friend and her son at a museum. My son knows very well that when I announce that it's our stop, that he needs to get back on the stroller. This time he decided to test me and threw a major protest tantrum. At that moment, what I should have done was to turn around and go home. It would have made a significant impact - I can picture him talking about it for a long time. But more importantly, it would give him an opportunity to try it again - to do tshuvah the next time. Instead, against my better judgment, I gave him the opportunity to try again right then and there. It was mainly because I just didn't want to go home. I was really looking forward to our outing, and to go home would mean a long, boring morning. So I gave him another chance. This was futile on my part. I know my kid - once he loses it, he can't get it back. He needed to turn around and go home - and try again another day. Needless to say, the day was not a success and the breakdowns got worse.

Sometimes it seems, no matter how hard we want to work on something, it we are not in a calm frame of mind, the efforts are fruitless. And this is all the more true with a tempermental little one.

Next time, I hope, we'll turn around and go home. It's certainly more pleasant to have a dull morning at home than a frustrating (and loud!) one out. And it would give my kid a realistic opportunity to try it again - another day.

1 comment:

Maya said...

I'm so glad you wrote this. Sometimes I feel bad for cancelling plans with people when, on the way over, my daughter is having a melt-down. Now I feel better about cancelling.